Question of the day

"How come in Vancouver (WA) you get to have Jello with dinner?"

George Martin on the drive back from spending the holidays in Vancouver, WA.

Good question! Does anyone know the answer?

Quote of the day

"When I'm a grown up and I have kids that don't eat I'm going to say 'Oh dang it'!"

George Martin today while riding his bike back from 15th

Snow and other things I think are funny

Above is a Hanukkah card George made for me. The text is 100% from George's mouth.
Clay wrote it out for him.

"Happy Hanukkah from Eric Estrada.
Two of these Eric Estrada's are named Eric Estrada.
Do you want to pop a wheelie?"

Inside it said-
"Happy Hanukkah Mommy!
I hope you feel good.
From me and Goldie."




George and Peter before their trip to space. What you can't see is the jet pack George made out of a cardboard box and tied to Peter's back.

Goldie riding George's bike through the house but stopping long enough to pick up a Hanukkah present.

I bought Clay a pair of $10 gloves from the GAP and look what he bought me. Because of the snow he couldn't get it out of his car so he showed me this picture instead.
Of course I had no idea what it was. New windshield wipers?
Nope, a very slick desk from Retro Fit home. Woo- hoo!

This isn't funny. George really had to pee and when we put him on the potty he had a little "accident" all over Clay who happenend to be in his way. Why is he smiling when he actually got pee in his mouth? Clay is such a good sport! See why I love him?

Welcome Holiday Card Readers!

Glad you could join us!

Here is our update-

• Clay is having his third child in April and hasn't gained an ounce of weight.


• We moved to a big old house that may or may not be haunted.


• Clay is starting to get grey chest hairs.


• Goldie dumps all her food out on the table on a regular basis, this morning it was Cheerios and milk.


• George wants a sword for Hanukkah and I'm having serious issues with it.


• We have a fish bowl with two fish that keep dying. One is named Nardy and the other is Facewipe.


• George thinks it is time that we "introduce Goldie to the world."


• Goldie wants to wear flip flops in the snow.


• Our Roomba is serving as the fifth member of the family until the actual 5th member arrives.


• Goldie wore two skirts to bed last night over her footie pj's.

I think that is about it for '08.

Send me your address if you want a card- I'm not through sending them out!!!

Eliza update

Eliza is our new neighbor. She is in kindergarten and a while back I posted about her asking me if Clay was my first husband. She is one of the spunkiest kids I've ever met and I've known a lot of kids. Remember, I use to teach and run summer camps. Yesterday morning while eating the world's best cinnamon rolls,
http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2007/06/cinammon_rolls_/
she looks at my ever-growing belly that is 23 weeks full of baby (and cinnamon rolls)and says, "Gee Robin, I remember when you use to be skinny."
And, I've only known her since August. I like a kid who tells it like it is.

Smelly car, smelly car. What are you feeding me?

Here is how to stink up a car, by Goldie Martin age 21 months


1. After your mom buys you a warm milk at Starbucks take a few sips and toss it at your brother's toes being sure to soak the floor and seats.
2. Eat red Jello in your carseat. It doesn't really stink but gives everything a nice rosy hue. A big shout out to Nana for this good idea!
3. Have a cinnamon Molly Moon's ice cream cone, eat it slowly and cry when your dad tries to take it away 'cause it is time to go so he lets you have it in the car. Then, when you get to your final destination and Dada asks if you finished your cone nod yes and let your Mama find it melted next to your carseat in the morning.
4. Watch your mom walk through dog doo doo and get it all over her jeans, shoes and socks. Then, when she thinks you have a poopy diaper and blames you for stinkin' up the car, laugh really hard and mutter "idiot" under your breath.

I, Goldie Martin, accomplished all this in a 24 hour period. Am I good, or what?
Cheers.

George Speaks

George had two funny quotes today-

"Mommy, you are overwhelming me."

Said at the Macy's FAO gift shop where he was begging me to buy him a stuffed dog.
And yes, I did buy it. He only has 500 stuffed animals, what is one more?


"The world isn't fun anymore since they stopped making Polaroid Cameras."

He's been obsessed with Polaroid cameras and is sad that they are going to be discontinued. I'm sad as well. Moment of silence please.

Hint to Auntie Donna- I know a three year old who wants a Polaroid for Hanukkah.

Gross, part III

My kids are such nose pickers.
Today Goldie fell asleep in her car seat.
She had been out for about 45 minutes when I looked in the rear view mirror to see her picking her nose in her sleep.
It never stops.
Both kids pick day and night. Not sure about baby #3, stay tuned for that info.

Gross!

The nerve!

Remember in the 70's when it was okay to litter? (Clay doesn't remember, and that may be because his parents were better than mine.) I remember having a McDonalds milkshake and tossing the whole thing, shake and all, out the window of my mom's Toyota where I was sitting in the front seat without a seat belt.
It wasn't until "give a hoot, don't pollute" and Woodsy the Owl when I realized it was wrong. 1977 perhaps?

Fast forward 3o+ years to this morning, 8 a.m. I'm walking on 15th after Boot Camp class and see a lady roll down her car window and toss her trash out the window.
I was shocked. I couldn't bite my tongue. I looked at her through her open window, and said "Don't worry, I'll pick that up for you." Of course she ignored me.
The nerve!

Roomba!

Remember the Simpson's episode where Homer says to a spoiled ten-foot hoagie that has given him food poisoning: "Sandwich, I could never stay mad at you."? He pulls it out of the trash because Marge has urged him to get rid of it. He's been eating and dragging it around for weeks with a nibble here and there.
I am going to guess that no one remembers, which is fine 'cause it really doesn't have to do with anything and I just think it is funny.

Which leads me to the next funny subject: Roomba.
Clay bought our family a Roomba on Amazon because this house has a lot of floor space which is often covered in dust and grime.
Long story short is that our family is in love.
And, when I say our family I really mean George, Goldie and Clay. It has saved us from getting a housekeeper for a while longer and the kids play tag with it. Goldie tells the Roomba goodnight before going to bed and the other day I could have sworn I heard Clay whisper to the Roomba "you complete me." I feel as though we're now a family of 5. Clay wants to get a car seat for the Roomba so we never have to be without it.
And, when it fell down the stairs on Sunday he said "Oh Roomba!" In his best Homer Simpson hoagie lovin' voice.

Cyber Monday- or Tuesday

My friend Debbie is doing this VERY COOL fundraiser for Heifer Project.
This is a copy of the email she sent me this week.
I just purchased my raffle tickets and think it is a super thing to support.

"Some of you already know that I've been hard at work for the past
month organizing Passports With Purpose, a travel blogger's fundraiser
for Heifer International. The fundraiser launched today, and I'd like
to ask for your support. It's easy, and fun. This is a raffle, where
you buy tickets ($10 each) for a chance to win some truly fantastic
prizes.

You can find a complete list of prizes at
http://www.PassportsWithPurpose.com, but here are a few of my
favorites:

3 Nights at the Wyland Waikiki in Hawaii ($400+)
$150 Gift Card to B&H Photo (valid online and in store) ($150)
$100 Gift Card for any hotel in the Mr. and Mrs. Smith Hotel Collection ($100)
$200 shopping spree with ExOfficio & $100 lunch ($300)
Ergo Hands Free Baby Carrier and iPod Shuffle ($213)

Each $10 donation buys you one raffle ticket and you get to choose
which prize drawing you enter.

Best of all, the money goes to people who truly need it. Heifer
International's mission is to help lift the world's poorest people out
of poverty... not with one-time donations, but by giving them the
means to support themselves. Through Heifer, families are given
animals that can help stave off starvation and provide income. Even a
small amount of money helps. $20 (the cost of two raffle tickets)
purchases a flock of chicks who feed on scraps, but produce both food
and income for a family. Our goal is to raise $5000 for Heifer, and a
few hours in, we're already almost 10% of the way there. With your
help, I know we can do even more.

Please consider diverting some of your "Cyber Monday" shopping money
to support Passports With Purpose today.

Thanks so much!

Debbie Dubrow
http://www.deliciousbaby.com
Twitter: @deliciousbaby"

End of her post. More later about our newest family member. No, not the baby. That isn't until April. I'm talking about the Roomba!

Back home with craziness!

We've been home a week now and it's good. We loved Hawaii but we do love home as well. Here is our week in review. Maybe kind of boring for some.

Goldie wore her bathing suit on the airplane and refused to get dressed. Finally we got pants on her and later a shirt so she didn't land in Seattle half naked.
In fact, as I type this she is wearing her swim suit over her pants and shirt. We've reached a new high... or low.

The last two nights in a row George woke up during the night yelling, "read the Lorax to me!" He's having crazy almost fever-like dreams. He falls back to sleep and doesn't remember any of it. I like that the book he dreams about is the Lorax. How did Dr. Suess know so much before anyone else? Even George Bush 30 years later isn't as in touch with the environment. I think my George actually has a better understanding about this subject than our current president.

Nana and Baba brought George his cousin Max's old bike which we let him ride in the house. I never would have let him do it in our old place but it seems appropriate here. This house is made for bike riding. This morning I let him eat Cheerios (with milk) on it. I've sunk to such lows and just may win a parenting award.

We finally took our Halloween decorations down and are talking about Hanukkah. George wants a "a bad guy set" which of course they don't make and even if they did I wouldn't buy it. We don't want violent toys of any sort. Same with electronic. In fact, we've got so much crap accumulating that we'd prefer to get a bunch of good books. (If that isn't a huge hint to the grandparents (and Auntie Donna) I don't know what is!) Here is another hint http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/ref=sv_cm_gft_3

Last night I puked about 7 times as we had company over for dinner. I was feeling pretty badly all day and was sitting on the couch waiting for Clay to come back with Thai food when it hit me. I barely made it to the bathroom. Yep, for those of you wondering, I'm pregnant. 18 weeks now. And, we found out the gender today!!

Here are some photos to prove that we really were on vacation. See my belly?

Clay's birthday!

Let it be known that Clay turns 45 on the 12th. This is ample time to send him proper greetings to Clay@pattern25.com

More later- we need to go watch the fire dancers on the grass outside.

Bedtime!

I'll make this brief 'cause it is past 9pm and we gots to get some sleep around here!
We are still in Hawaii, which is amazing, but the kids wake up around 6:00am which doesn't really work for me. (We have 3 house sitters so if you are thinking of breaking into our house you are out of luck. Plus we ain't got no stuff except some booze which I'm sure the house sitters have already consumed.)
Not sure what to report other than we are having a great time playing on the beach, eating shaved ice and peeing on the carpet in the hotel. (That would be Goldie who pee'd next to my dad's side of the bed and on our balcony. If you ever go to Ko' Olina you may want to avoid room 905.)
Tomorrow we are off to the North Shore to look for sea turtles and authentic shaved ice http://www.matsumotoshaveice.com/.
And, if George gets his way a ride on the super touristy sugar cane train at the Dole pineapple plant.
G'night.

Phew!

Barak sent me this email tonight and I couldn't have been happier to have received it. (I think Barack must have been informed of our bake sale and that is why he emails me so often. Even Michelle checks in daily.)
His victory is a huge relief! Didn't his speech tonight bring tears to your eyes? And his Grandma missed it all... makes me even more sad. And his Grandma missed it all... more tears.
Nonetheless, a very happy, happy day.



Robin --

I'm about to head to Grant Park to talk to everyone gathered there, but I wanted to write to you first.

We just made history.

And I don't want you to forget how we did it.

You made history every single day during this campaign -- every day you knocked on doors, made a donation, or talked to your family, friends, and neighbors about why you believe it's time for change.

I want to thank all of you who gave your time, talent, and passion to this campaign.

We have a lot of work to do to get our country back on track, and I'll be in touch soon about what comes next.

But I want to be very clear about one thing...

All of this happened because of you.

Thank you,

Barack

Aloha!

Can you use that like Shalom? Hello and goodbye?
Not sure but we are off to Hawaii in the am.
Stay tuned for *hopefully* funny stuff.

Vote!

George told us that he's going to vote for John McCain, then Hilary Clinton, then Joe the Plumber.
We didn't ask him, he volunteered all this info.
GULP!
Just to verify I asked about Barak Obama and he said "Nope, not Barak Obama. Just John McCain because I love him."

Ungebloozen

The setting-
George is in the back of the car listening to The Beattles album Yellow Submarine, which he has loved since he was a small baby. The song "Hey, Bulldog" comes on and says something about "if you're lonely you can talk to me."
When we get to our destination, which shall remain nameless for fear of being judged by good parents, he starts singing
"If your ungebloozen don't talk to me."
My mom and dad were present and thought this was the funniest thing they'd ever heard.
Ungebloozen means surly in yiddish and apparently I've used this word a few times with George.
If you don't get it, ask your Jewish friends if this is funny. It is. Trust me on this.

My little troublemaker(s)

Goldie is such a troublemaker! The other day while Clay was folding laundry and I was off gallivanting around town Goldie got into a box of markers and colored her arms, face, tights, shoes and George's bed. She even got the pillowcase and sheets!
And, George watched her do it!
And, Clay had no idea what was happening.
Which one is the actual troublemaker?

Nardy and Facewipe Martin

George went to Nana and Baba's house last month and returned with two goldfish in a plastic bag. He lovingly named them Nardy and Facewipe. One morning Nardy and Facewipe were both found dead and were quickly flushed. George didn't notice the missing fish for about a week but when he did he was mad as hell! I called my mom, aka:Nana, who raced her butt up to Crossroads Mall and spent 26 cents on Nardy and Facewipe's doppelgangers.
When she came over with them seconds later she said something about the fish having a sleep over at her house and how fun it was.
George was relieved to see them and said, in an almost parental voice, that they can't ever do that again.

Banana bread

Hey Jill- (but others can read it 'cause it makes fun of Clay)
This is funny.
Remember when you were over and Clay was outside and I told him that there was some yummy banana bread on the counter for him to eat? He went inside and found Nancy's Irish soda bread instead.
When I got home from the doctor I asked him if he thought the bread was good and he said it was terrible. I couldn't understand why he'd call your culinary creation anything but top notch.
When I figured out that he'd mistaken the two, he said your bread was indeed fantastic and Nancy's bread was the worst banana bread he'd ever eaten but really good soda bread.
Like I've said before, he is very cute.

Damn!

What happens when you wash, in the same load, a maroon cashmere sweater, white towels and assorted underwear, socks and jeans?
Ask Mr. Clay if you want to know the answer.
Yes, the cashmere sweater *was* mine but I'll be handing it over to Goldie, if it isn't too small for her.
And, the white towels are now pinkish so they'll look good in our powder blue bathroom.

Obama, baby!

Did you hear the one about about the Obama bake sale that raised $250?
Yep, a few weeks ago George and his buddy Everest had a bake sale in front of our house and seven batches of cookies later they had $250!
Debbie, Everest's mom, and I took the kids down to the Obama offices where they got stickers and a lot of praise for their good work.
Incase anyone is interested I think my dad is planning a McCain bake sale next week. It will be in Bellevue and he's selling Oreo cookies, the kind with hydrogenated fat.

The above pictures crack me up. We would have made $300 if G and E didn't eat the product. And, Goldie was pissed off 'cause I wouldn't let her open the chocolate chips. She is so SASSY!

New Neighbors!

We love our old neighbors Ashley and Nancy. In fact they were the reason we didn't make an inital offer on our current house. Remember we made a backup offer after it looked like the first offer was going to fall apart? And, when we did it was a tearful decision. In retrospect it is funny 'cause we moved 4 blks from our old place.
Tonight we hosted a dinner for the old neighbors and the new neighbors. We thought thought they should meet since they both have daughters named Ruby. Just joking, it is really because we like both couples.
One of the best parts about the new folks is their kindergarten aged daughter who asked me last week if Clay was my first husband! (He's my first but not my last, dar-ling. To be read in your best Zsa Zsa Gabor voice)
The dinner was fun.
Clay wants me to come upstairs. I really wanted to write a post but I am cutting it short for my husband. Sorry folks.

We are back!

We've been MIA, sorry about that. We promise to post on a more regular basis.
The following post is being dictated by George Irman Martin.

"Why is it slimy? Yana manyana. Write that, okay?"
The setting- George is sitting on my lap wearing purple underpants and playing with his belly button.
He has just finished unwinding a box of dental floss, mint flavored. He sucked the mint off and wants to know why is it slimy.
My answer is because you put it in your grubby little mouth.
"Tell them belly button."
I say, tell the readers something that makes for more interesting reading.
"Tell them BOBBY"
Bobby is what Goldie calls her bottle, not so interesting.
Now he is doing what sounds like labor breathing in my ear and asking me to type that.
It is hard to explain that I can't.
We are off to a great start.

Woo-hoo!

Things are looking up for us! We got an offer on our house, countered and the folks accepted. In this particular market we feel especially lucky- the whole process took two weeks. Again, woo-hoo!
And, I am starting to like the new house. The kitchen is 99% complete and most meals cooked in it have been fab!
We also ordered a KING sized mattress yesterday so we'll be deflating the Aero bed next week.

We moved!

And it sucks. Everything is in boxes. Everything is a mess.
I miss our old house and I don't even have a proper internet connection.
Too busy to write- will find time later.

New Yogurt Flavors!

Yesterday I took George grocery shopping with me. We stopped in the dairy aisle and I asked him to pick out a yogurt. He pointed to a container that was coffee flavored and had pictures of beans drawn on it. He mistook the beans for hot dogs and requested that I purchase him the "hot dog kind".
What a unique concept, hot dog flavor! Chunks at the bottom is my addition.

Gross, part II

This morning while at Volunteer Park I saw a woman and her dog stop at the drinking fountain. The dog jumped up and literally drank from the fountain while the lady held the button for him. His paws were in the bowl and he was slurping and drinking and grossing me out from head-to-toe. I was horrified- am I overreacting?

Attackle

What do you get when you combine attack and tackle?
Attackle.
This is what George calls it when Goldie pulls his hair and jumps on him.
I'll use it in its most common sentence.
"Mommy, Goldie is attackling me!"

Nana, at your service

My kids adore Nana. According to them she can do no wrong.
Imagine, if you will, the following scene.
We are at my mom's house and it is 5pm. George and Goldie are hungry and I'm making soup for them. George is sitting at the table waiting for his soup while Goldie is out of her seat yelling and pointing at my mom's pantry. My mom walks over to the pantry and opens it up for her. Her yells are getting louder and she is frantically trying to show Nana something that is in a basket on the door. Oh, it is a lollipop. (Lollipops are usually a special treat maybe earned on a long car ride or perhaps after a doctor appointment that involves shots.)
Not according to Nana. She takes the lollipop down, puts Goldie in her high chair and gives it to her for dinner.
Her rational when questioned?
"It was root beer flavor, I honestly didn't think she'd eat it."

And, if that wasn't enough she tried to feed her soup while she sucked the lollipop.
Oddly enough she didn't want any.

gross!

Do you want to know what is gross?
Sharing water with Goldie is very,very gross. Whatever she has eaten in the last 7 hours appears in my glass.
What is even grosser?
Sharing salad with Goldie.
She picks the leaves off my plate, sucks the dressing off, tosses it around in her mouth and spits it back on my plate.
And I, the unsuspecting salad eater, accidentally eat a piece of warm salad. Yuck.
She is also a nose picker just like her brother.

Story review- Schtoompah, by Richard Scarry

Richard Scarry is very popular in our house. His sense of humor is so quirky!
My favorite story is about Schtoompah, the funny Austrian.
Schtoompah was a funny fellow. He was not very tidy. Instead of putting things away neatly, he would just throw them in the closet. It goes on to tell about how he had a concert and couldn't find his tuba and when he did find it he rode his bike to the band concert with it on his head and finally when the concert was about to start ("Uh-ein, uh-zwei, uh-drei!" counts the conductor), all sorts of stuff comes flying out, including a pickaxe, cleats, and lederhosen. (If I had a tuba the same thing would happen, we all know it is true except I don't own lederhosen or any kind of gear. I guess shampoo and dirty clothes would fly out.)
This story has made an impact on George as well. Yesterday we were outside watching the Blue Angels (George has been enjoying the air shows with the exception of the one bad driver. And, I don't know what that means. Clay thinks George saw one one of the pilots on his cell phone.) when one of our neighbors summoned us over. I said hello and was talking to her and said, "George, can you say hi." George looked at this lady, who has piles and piles of crap on her front porch and said, "Hi Schtoompah."
And yes I laughed. It was funny and she didn't hear and most likely isn't reading Ricahrd Scary 'cause her son is in his late 30's (Just like me!!! Gulp).

Clay says this is funny to us but really is a big build up to a story that is kind of mean. I can't help it, I am mean. Now we all know it is true. (However, Clay is meaner 'cause he wouldn't get coffee or lunch with me on my birthday. Good thing he isn't smart enough to know how to comment on my blog. I don't want him to defend himself to my three readers and one ex-boyfriend.)
End of post.

Question of the day

This is from George.

"What would you do if 160 people in wheel chairs showed up at your house and you were sick and needed a wheel chair and there wasn't one for you?"

and my response-

"Make cupcakes."

It's my birthday!

You still have five more hours to wish me happy birthday.
Then you are too late!

Darn it!

I'm going to make this brief 'cause I've got to get some sleep.
Here is a good one for you-
Goldie sucked on my *new* cell phone, yes the phone that replaced the one that slid into Clay's cup of coffee, and RUINED it. I had to buy a new phone tonight because she absolutely soaked it and it will not even turn on. (On the bright side the new phone is a really beautiful red one!)
Dumb me for letting her play with it.

I have the following link in my favorites so I know what to do should there be a next time.
http://www.wikihow.com/Save-a-Wet-Cell-Phone

Who knew that leaving your phone in dry rice would help to absorb the moisture?

Another one for you, dad.

I just ordered a very cool t-shirt that says Obama Mama.
The money goes to his campaign and I feel good about it.

http://store.barackobama.com/Shirts_s/111.htm

P.S.

We didn't win the lottery.

Stuff

My mom calls me this afternoon from the parking lot of McDonalds in Bellevue. (My mom and dad go there most days for lunch when they are not at Taco Time or Chipolte.)
Her voice sounded odd and she said, "We've run into some trouble and I'm not sure we'll be able to watch the kids tonight". (My friend Heather from Guido's pizza fame was in town and we were headed over to Cafe Lago with our old boss Robin. Robin's brother-in-law and sister-in-law own Cafe Lago so she's really fun to dine with as she knows the menu intimately. Plus, it is just so fun to be with Robin and Heather.)
Nonetheless, my mom has run into some trouble.
The trouble, according to my mom, was that a car, as she put it, ran over their car and was parked on their hood. Huh? "Mom", I asked her "is the car literally sitting on your hood"? She tells me yes and I'm pretty interested in how it all went down. The story is actually very sad and involves a lady in her late 70's so I'll spare you all that and focus on the good and funny parts which include that no one was injured (they were inside eating their McNuggets), my dad told the lady it wasn't a big deal (which is a big fat whopper of a lie 'cause it was his brand spankin' new 2008 Cadillac but he wanted to make her feel better.)
The fire dept came, people watched and took pictures and my dad told me tonight that for sure the pictures would turn up on "the blog". He doesn't know I have a blog 'cause I want to make fun of him without him knowing but sure enough, the pictures are on "the internet blog". This is for you dad. I'm proud of you for being so darn nice.

Sunday dinner

As usual we had Sunday dinner with the Jefferson's next door. Nancy made the world's best chicken. The proof is that Goldie has been walking around for the last hour gnawing on chicken bones. Below Nancy describes the meal and how it was prepared.

"Delicious impromptu dinner, although not that impromptu as there was time enough to marinate the chicken."

Follow these directions and you'll thank me in the morning. (Robin, not that crazy lady named Nancy.)

One 4 lb. best of fryer (she used that cheap shitty brand Draper Farms which normally sucks)
2 tablespoons minced shallots
2 tablespoons minced garlic
1 tablespoons grated ginger
2 tablespoons cumin
1 tablespoon coriander
3-5 tablespoons canola oil
3 tablespoons minced parsley
1 squirt of siracha sauce
1 tsp kosher salt
1/4 tsp fresh black pepper

Make into a paste and spread on chicken. Let sit for 2 hours and grill on high until brown, turn heat down and cover and cook until done. (on the bbq, folks)

We also made salmon cakes with leftover salmon and mashed potatoes and a yummy berry free form tart (or gallette but I'm not sure how to spell galette) Actually, Nancy is back on The South Beach so the tart was an extra special treat. I just had to get the mention in that she is dieting again and I hate it when she diets. My life suffers.

This meal was gooooooooooood. (not God, good.)
End of post, back to drinking wine on the porch.

Ether!

I had a dream last night that I was back living in Vienna but only with Goldie.
No Clay and no George. Goldie was colicky so I took her to the pharmacy to help "heal" her and the pharmacist recommended ether. He suggested soaking a cloth in it and putting it over her mouth. So, of course I followed his good advice knocking her out and going about my merry way.
How crazy is that? Goldie has never been colicky and is actually a really good baby! (that probably isn't the ridiculous part of the dream but one of elements that stuck me, of course.)
Which leads me to my next question- have you ever seen the Curious George book when George gets hold of the bottle of ether and passes out? This was clearly written years ago and would never fly now. It is so funny yet disturbing. Just like my dream.

Spiderman, spiderman!

Tonight George wore his new Spiderman cape and made mischief of one kind or another. (If we had a dog I'm sure he would have chased him down the stairs while holding a fork.)
He absolutely needed a cape so we cut up an old t-shirt that belonged to my nephew Max and reconfigured it. He wore it to the park, he wore it to a Thai restaurant and he wore it and played super heroes with Liam next door.
He played so hard but why in the heck isn't he tired? It is 9pm and I'm exhausted.

We've been so busy (gambling)!

We've had a ton of guests the last week and our last visitor leaves tomorrow. Yes, I'll be back to posting about all the dumb stuff that I think is funny very soon.
To satisfy your desires I'll give you three readers a little update on our day and tell about the lucky pennies our family found today. George found two at the swimming pool, I found one while walking on Broadway and Clay found one walking outside our house. And, if that wasn't enough someone handed Clay a penny out of the blue tonight not knowing about all these pennies. (No, it wasn't change for something he purchased, it was Ashley's mom from next door saying that he needed it to pay for the new house.) All this good luck was making me itch so I made my dad immediately drive George and I to 7-11. (Sharon and Hans were over for a short visit, not to take me to 7-11 at 9pm.) I bought ten lotto tickets, with Clay's cashola, and my dad bought nine with his retirement money. I also talked him into buying a scratch ticket and he won five bucks on the spot. (George cried when we had to give the scratch ticket back to claim our prize.) This was George's first trip to 7-11 and his first experience with gambling. It was very educational. He drank two coffee creamers, looked at the chips and admired the Slurpee machines. Damn- I should have showed him the nacho cheese and explained how cheese can also come in a liquid form. I promised we could go there again soon, maybe even tomorrow when we have to collect our millions. (Insert pinky in corner of mouth and laugh a wicked laugh.)

Please?

Clay's a good dad, that's for certain. He makes mean scrambled eggs, lays bricks with ease, and puts George to bed nightly. If forced to criticize I'd say that dressing Goldie wasn't one of his strengths. This morning he put her in clean jeans and a clean long sleeve t-shirt (it is supposed to be 75 degrees today!) with a dirty onesie and dirty socks that she wore the previous day. Sometimes he puts her dresses on backward or with a pair of pants. A few times pajama tops as real tops. I'm thankful that he dresses her, changes her diapers and is loving so most of the time I'm silent. But come on, at least give the kid some clean socks!

The big move

We are hoping to move in (chuckle-chuckle) the next 4 to 6 weeks.
I'm not convinced we'll have a kitchen by then so I am planning on doing most of our cooking on the bbq. (Thanks Diana for the great idea!)
Doesn't this recipe sound so good?
http://www.101cookbooks.com/archives/grilled-pizza-recipe.html
Any person to leave a comment could possibly win dinner at our house and a chance to eat bbq pizza.
(My friend Debbie at www.Deliciousbaby.com is giving away an ergo carrier and has over 200 comments on her blog. I gotta keep up. I'm asking for just three comments total. Come on reader(s), you can do it!)

Update at 12:12pm- this post has been up for one hour now and not one comment has been logged. Either no one reads this blog or the prize isn't good enough. I'll throw in a pair of Clay's underpants as well. Is that a more attractive offer?

Hey Mommy

"Hey Mommy, look at this. It looks like a clam."
Says George Martin as he puts something small and brown into my hand.
I think it looks like something else so of course I smell it.
It is something else. It is cat poop.
Thanks G.

Beach!

Goldie can now say beach. It seems that she loves four things, in this order.
1. George
2. Shoes
3. Beach
4. and swings (she says wee)

Here are some pictures from the 4th on Camano Island.

My favorite word

Entry by George Martin, age 3

Do you know my favorite word?
Swim trunks.
An elephant has a trunk.
Isn't that funny?

Babies having babies

When I was in first grade my best friend Katie Brennen (Katie if you happen to Google your name and see this I'd love to catch up!) and I got into her dad's shaving cream and had an absolute ball coating her fence, our hands and her cat Puffy. This lasted until her mom came outside and took the shaving cream away and reprimanded us. She was so angry and I never really understood why. Puffy seemed to like it.
That is why when Goldie was sleeping last week I proposed that George and I take out daddy's shaving cream and play! (I purchased 8 large cans of the stuff at Costco for pennies and figured that if Clay came home and we got in trouble there'd at least be seven more cans for him and he tends to use an electric razor so he'd be okay for the next 18 years.) We first started inside. I put Saran wrap onto a cookie sheet and neatly George dipped his pinky into the lather. After about thirty seconds he was making a mess and we moved into the backyard where clothing was removed (not mine) and George wanted to hold the can, spray the cream and make a mess.
After over an hour in the backyard with "the cream", George delighted in his typical bathing routine which takes place in Tupperware (see post entitled Our Week in Review) and made an even greater mess cleaning himself.
And, Clay came home and we didn't even get grounded, or anything.

Conversation at breakfast this morning

George- "Do you know where I've worked for so many years."
Me- "No, where?"
George- "At high school."
Me- "Interesting."
George- "Do you know where I've worked for this many years (holding up five fingers)?"
Me- "High school?"
George- "No, Microsoft. Is Fuel Coffee shop Microsoft?"

Conclsion- George thinks his daddy works at coffee shops.

The week in review, again

If you are reading this blog then you have an interest in what we've been doing so I'll bore you with more photos.



I was taking a shower in the basement on Sunday morning and opened the shades to see these two cutie pies playing in our side yard. George claims this is where the big bad wolf lives so I'm not sre why he was even back there.



Later in the day George got dressed without any help and in the process emptied his dresser drawers onto the floor.



He also did a bit of art and colored on his tummy. (and arm, fingernail, toenail and leg)

Raise your hand if you like the movie Flash Dance!

Hey Larry, this one will make you proud.

Larry is Clay's dad. Also know as Grandpa LaLa.

So, after this big remodel that spread a thick layer of construction grit through every inch of the house Clay did the proper thing which was hiring a professional cleaning crew to come in and de-toxify our house. You know, before we move in and drop food on the floor and eat it. This is a company that advertised that they specialized in cleaning up construction/remodel sites. In my mind I imagined a crew of four buff men with leaf blowers and motorized cleaning tools. Nope. Today when the cleaning crew arrived it was three little ladies, one of them pregnant, carrying Swiffers and pink feather dusters. Okay maybe the feather dusters weren't pink but one of the ladies was 100% pregnant. Why on earth was she cleaning up our mess? Ugh. Talk about guilt. She did wear a mask but it was of the Incredible Hulk so I'm not sure it was helpful. Clay did stick around all day to make it look like he was working as well just so he'd feel a wee less guilty. (We all know that Clay was actually downloading ring tones onto his cell phone.) For our next project Clay says he'll do the clean up himself (unless there is a 7 months pregnant lady available at a good price).

Camp Robin

Right now I have four children under my watchful eye. Two of them belong to our friend Dave who is busy being a rockstar on KEXP. I'm not joking, he's doing a live gig on the radio with his band Head Like a Kite http://www.headlikeakite.com/ and it sounds great. (I tried to find it in the KEXP archives and link it here but I'm not smart enough.)

Dave, who created the band, is a very funny man. Clay went to Western with Dave and his wife Diana and the three of them started http://www.pattern25.com/ .

The reason I am mentioning all of this is because when Dave came to pick up his children he was dressed up like a pilot, I think. He even drew himself a mustache, which actually made him look like Clay's dad on his last visit. (See above photo from last summer and yes, that is George wearing a chicken costume while eating dinner.) The funniest part of it all was that Dave's gig was on the radio, not tv and not one listener could see his costume.

Back to all the kids in my backyard, they are hopping up and down making ice cream in

ziploc bags. This is one of my favorite projects leftover from my days as a camp director.

What you'll need:
1 tablespoon sugar
1/2 cup milk or half & half
1/4 teaspoon vanilla
6 tablespoons rock salt (I used kosher salt)
1 pint-size Ziploc plastic bag (heavy duty)
1 gallon-size Ziploc plastic bag (heavy duty)
Ice cubes
How to make it:
Fill the large bag half full of ice, and add the rock salt. Seal the bag.
Put milk, vanilla, and sugar into the small bag, and seal it.
Place the small bag inside the large one and seal again carefully.
Shake until mixture is ice cream, about 5 minutes.
Wipe off top of small bag, then open carefully and enjoy!

Our children's garden, finally

We finally had time to plant our children's garden and I think I need to summarize exactly what we did. I have a hunch it is going to work.

We planted the following
8 dead strawberry plants that haven't been watered in weeks.
Handfuls of corn seeds in approximately 4 holes (This is not counting the kernels that Goldie ate.)
Carrots seeds strewn upon the sidewalk and a few in the dirt.
Bachelor buttons and pansies.
Oh yeah, and an absolutely dead tomato plant that Goldie kept pulling out of the dry potting soil.
I'll make sure to post photos as things start to "bloom".

Turkey what?

We went to Camano Island again last weekend. The new state park opened and Clay and I were interested in checking it out. Cama Beach = http://www.parks.wa.gov/camabeach/

They refurbished cabins from the 30's and practically charge rental rates from the 30's. The cabins are right on the water and so cozy with handmade quilts and rustic wood floors. George and Clay walked on the beach which is really rocky and filled with crabs, clams and other yuck. George found empty clam shells and picked them up and announced that we were going to make clam chowder with them. (He's never even tasted clam chowder or clams so we thought this was especially funny.)

Our trip was really good with the exception of both kids waking up at 4:30am Sunday morning. Clay and I tried so hard to get them back to sleep with no luck so we ventured off to Starbucks at 5 something am. The store wasn't open yet so we literally sat in the parking lot waiting.

Once inside Goldie had apple juice (she's the second child) and as I was reading the packaging I noticed it said Concentrate from Turkey on the back. I thought that was interesting, 'cause it was now 6:01am, and I said to Clay "This juice has concentrate from Turkey in it."

Then, I said "Is Turkey known for their exceptional crop of apples?" And, my ever so bright husband said "Oh I thought you meant turkey concentate from a turkey." Agh! He is really cute though.

Right now he's back to his crazy hardware boiling trick. I'll keep this brief only to let you know that he boils the hardware from our new house in Borax and then peels the paint off.

The above image is what I saw in our backyard today. Yes, he owns the respirator. I don't understand why he didn't want me to post this. I don't think anyone even reads this blog. If you do be sure and leave a comment.

Our week in review

See this cute girl? George and her touched tounges at Madrona park on Monday night.
We had popsicles and Ruby finished hers first and then licked George's tounge to try and get some of his.
Does this count as a first kiss? Rather clever strategy, Ruby.
And yes, George is sitting in a Tupperware full of water. He does this often.

The mayor of Clyde Hill is really named George Martin. We went to get Goldie a passport for that trip to Paris we wont be taking.

We went swimming in our living room 'cause it was too cold to swim outside.

Nana babysat G and G Wednesday night at her house. When we went to pick up the kids we found this young sweetie pie sleeping on the couch in a pile of popcorn. Thanks Nana! Last time she babysat I found M&M's in Goldie's carseat.

George found a worm as big as a snake. Okay, a baby snake.

Way to go Prius!

My family celebrated Father's day on Camano Island today.
Camano is about 60 miles north of Seattle and takes us about one hour door-to-door.
On our way home we stopped to fuel up. As Clay got back into the car he mention that it cost us $36 to fill up our car. One year ago we were paying around $22.
Pulling out of the gas station I made Clay drive very slowly to see what others were paying and to our horror we saw a Suburban with a tab of $153 and still pumping!
We averaged 51 mpg so the drive cost us less than $7.

Why doesn't every new car purchaser buy a hybrid? (Clay thinks I shouldn't write that as it sounds arrogant and he told me about a funny episode of South Park where the characters who drove hybrids sat around together basking in the scent of their farts.)

Which leads me straight into this new, at least new to me, concept of "people sorting" and like minded people clustering together in states, cities and communities. The book that explains it all is called The Big Sort: Why the Clustering of Like-Minded America Is Tearing Us Apart. Spending time with so many PLU's (People Like Us) makes the rare outsider seem wrong in all other ways. (I haven't read it yet so I don't really know what I'm talking about but maybe it helps explain why I'm quick to judge.)

By the way, my brother's girlfriend uses SPF 4 and my brother burns plastic in our fire pit at Camano. They seem like like-minded folks who found each other. Yay for clustering, I guess.

Go to sleep!

It is 10:56pm and George is still awake. Just now I was laying with him in his toddler bed "tickling" his back. I though he was almost out when he said to me in a very wide awake voice, "How do you say tickle my back in Hebrew?"
We love his school but I am stunned that he hasn't learned that phrase yet!

Art for Goldie's New Room

Hey Debbie-
Thought you'd like to see the new picture I ordered for Goldie's room.

We had one day of sun

I can't remember when it was but I know it was in the month of June.

No one I know wrote this

I didn't write the following post. It was on the mom's list serve in which I belong. Is it as weird as I think? Would you send this out to hundreds of people in your community with your name on it?

"I have a diaper rash (I dont wear diapers) and do not know how to treat it. I wore some underwear that was made of a different material and I think that is what had caused it. Now I have this huge rash. I have used Butt Paste on it but, don't know if that will help as its for babies. Any suggestions?"

Short story long and more boring with recipe

While taking a pilates class that sucked, I met a woman who had just moved to Seattle with her family. She used to do wardrobe for movies and met her husband on a movie set, unlike all our other friends who work for Microsoft.
After class I gave her "my card" suggesting that she call or email with any questions about Seattle.
Clay dislikes when I give needless background while telling a story but I want all my readers (Debbie, Nancy and maybe Julie if she hung in there) to know all the important details. She is in NY until late tonight so Clay and I invited her husband and kids over for dinner. (Her kids call my house Robin's restaurant and think I can cook well. Tee-hee.) Wanting to impress them even more, I made linguine with arugula and black pepper from Giada De Laurentii's "Everyday Pasta".
It is such an easy recipe and is most often a hit except when I screw it up by not adding enough salt or too much cheese.

Here is the recipe.

1 pound linguine
1/2 stick of butter
1 cup very finely grated Pecorino Romano
Salt to taste
1 1/2 teaspoons freshly ground black pepper
1 cup coarsely chopped arugula
Cut up the butter into cubes and put in a large bowl to let soften.
Use a big enough bowl to toss the pasta later.
Cook pasta until al dente, stirring every so often to keep from sticking to the bottom.
Grate the Pecorino, grind the black pepper, and chop the arugula while the pasta is cooking.
Save a cup of the pasta water and set aside and drain the pasta.
Immediately put the hot pasta into the bowl with the butter, add the arugula and toss to coat. Gradually add cheese and salt and pepper. Add in some reserved pasta water as needed. The pasta water makes the pasta taste like it is bathing in a cream sauce. Yum!
Taste the pasta and add salt, if needed.

By the way, I made them other things as well, not just pasta.
Bummer Clay left our camera at the new house 'cause a picture would have been lovely. Instead I'll post a picture of my darling children.

Thanks

A few weeks ago I invited my friend Debbie and her two children to the house my parents own on Camano Island. It was just for the day as Debbie's husband was in Berlin presenting a paper that won an award on a subject I can't even spell, much less write about.
We had a great day playing on the beach and splashing about in a plastic wading pool. And, playing fireman. (This is when George sprays you with the hose.)
When Debbie left she asked her son to say thank you to my parents for inviting them. George, in a rather bold manner interrupted and said "We didn't invite you, you invited yourself."
In keeping with the tradition of Debbie "inviting" her family places she sent me the following email last week.

Subject: When are you making this?
I want to drop by unexpectedly just as you pull it out of the oven.
http://www.thekitchn.com/thekitchn/dessert/weekend-recipe-rhubarb-lavender-crumble-052014

My response-
My calendar says June 5th.

Debbie's response-
perfect ;)

My response-
You guys will come for dinner, right?

Debbie's response-
Yes. Please tell George "This time, she not only invited herself over, she set the menu."

The crumble was yummy and we also had baked chicken and the following pasta from my latest obsession, The Chocolate and Zucchini cookbook.
http://chocolateandzucchini.com/archives/2006/05/cacao_zucchini_absorption_pasta.php

Thanks Debbie and feel free to invite your family over anytime.

By the way- Debbie has an interesting blog about travel with kids and she even posted pictures of the Camano trip.
http://www.deliciousbaby.com/journal/2008/may/20/daytrip-camano-island

If it smells blame the couch

Today at my mom's house I was sitting on the floor playing with George when suddenly I smelled the most horrible smell. I, of course, thought it was my feet. My feet were fine so I smelled George's feet, bottom and mouth. Nope, not him.
I looked under her couch and there was a baby bottle that must have been under there for a least three months.
When I told my mom she said my dad has been complaining that their couch was stinky. She said he's been upset about it for over a month. In fact, he was making plans to get a new couch.
I think I just saved him about 2k.

I love you Mr. Cway

Dear Clay,
You are also a loyal reader and I love you. (Good price on the cabinets!)
Let's see how long it takes you to find this.
Leave a comment before June 7th and you'll win a special prize- wink-wink.
Me

Hey Nancy

I don't think I have many readers with the exception of my dear friend Nancy who happens to be our next door neighbor for a couple more months. Because she is so loyal and entertaining she gets her own post.

Here is what I have to say to you Nancy Jo.

Any interest in taking a cooking class with me at this cool place in Magnolia called Dish It Up?

http://www.dish-it-up.com/

They've had chefs such as Ethan Stwole and Tom Douglas teach prior classes.

I think they are $70 each and include plentiful portions of food and wine. We are ordering our new kitchen cabinets from their kitchen designer which is kind of a longer post that I don't feel like writing about.

I'll also ask Debbie, Henley, Michelle and any other readers that I have. (Translation - I have no other readers except for ex boyfriends who have googled my name and are stalking me. You know who you are.)

I know you want me to do longer posts but I simply

a) don't have time

b) don't want to

c) don't care to

I'll end this post by telling you that I left a pan of cookies in the oven for over two hours tonight. I baked cookies to bring to a dinner party and spaced the second batch. They are in the backyard if you get a craving for charcoal. I thought about leaving them on your porch and telling you they were those double chocolate cookies from the Nigella Lawson book.

Signing off,

Robin Jo

P.S. The above picture was taken 3 days after Goldie was born. That is why I am wearing maternity pants.

Goldie doesn't really talk yet

Goldie is only 15 months so she only says apple, up, open, this, George, Dada and Mama. George, on the other hand, is three and has tons of words.

The following quote is from his school newsletter.

What an exciting week! We went to Kelsey Creek Farm and finished learning about the farm animals. The kids seemed to have a great time on the farm. Here’s what they said about it:
George: My favorite part was the duck because they are fun. One fell down on his head. One was eating ice cream cone. He threw it on the ground, then put it on a flower and fell under the water.

I believe that he believes this happened.

Coffee can burn you and also break your phone

My cell phone slid into Clay's coffee cup, which didn't have a lid on it, while we were driving home from Camano Island last weekend. It is, as you can imagine, no longer working.
I wish I could blame this on my children or at least Clay for not using a lid but it is my fault. Bummer.
I no longer have any numbers so don't expect a phone call from me.

Ouch!

"She's a baby, she doesn't know better. I know all about children."

Said George after Goldie dropped a horseshoe on my knee.

Nipples

"Hey mom, what are these?" George says lifting up his shirt and pointing to his nipples.
"Nipples." I reply
"They poke." He concludes.

He is a thoughful young man.

I'm slacking already

This is much harder than it seems.
Not a lot to report.

Day two

This isn't so hard.

Day One

Let's test this out, can I really make a blog?